Blog entry #5 By Jo Rodriguez
It has been many years since my assault and the place I find myself now has had me reflecting on the men and women that did everything they could to come together and try to make me feel safe. I recently attended a town hall meeting in San Antonio, Tx. that covered Domestic violence awareness. The presence of support from so many organizations for this cause and having the privilege to be there and listen to survivors and family members speaking on behalf of victims was truly moving.
During the town hall meeting, I heard frustration, anger, desperation, anguish, and tears as stories were shared. It woke up an even stronger calling to do more. This just solidified my mission and desire to want to help others in any way that I possibly can because not all survivors and victims get the justice that they deserve. I have felt both sides of this spectrum as my perpetrator was found guilty and punished, yet my daughter did not have the same outcome. Her perpetrator walks around carefree and feeling entitled because he thinks he got away with it.
So, yes, I found myself being able to relate to so much of what was said that evening. It stirred up a lot of emotion inside of me and I came to realize how lucky and fortunate I was to have the community of San Marcos, Tx.’s best by my side from the day my assault happened and after. ( I was born and raised in San Marcos, but had made a life in Lockhart when this happened)
My assault happened in February of 2004 and did not go to trial until May of 2007. My perpetrator was given a $300,000 bond and he was able to make bond. He was out free with conditions in order to protect my safety and my children’s safety. The San Marcos police department, Hays County District Attorney’s office, Hays county victims services, HCWS, and other agencies did not get the proper thank you from me that they deserved. I put together a thank you letter on the fly at the end of the trial that was published in newspapers. it now feels like it wasn’t enough. (I will post it below for you to read)
The San Marcos police department would patrol outside my parent’s house where I had been staying at the time to make sure that I felt as safe as I could at the time. Nothing felt safe for me anymore. Just to let them know, I was aware that they did this for me and it meant the world that they took this measure for someone they didn’t know. It took everything I had to keep myself together and sane, so them being there gave me comfort. As time passed, I had constant interaction with them with updates and support. I remember my detective letting me know that every officer had my photo and my perpetrator’s photo with them as they remained vigilant in protecting me. I had a protective order, I didn’t have faith that it would be enough to deter any more situations.
When the trial finally happened, I felt like I had an army of protection all around me. I had moved to my own place in San Marcos in order to provide some stability for my young kids. We stayed at my parents during the trial for our safety. The police department sent a patrol car to park outside because things became more unstable and my safety was at risk. The police sergeant that had been heading everything was Sgt. Penny Dunn. She kept a circle of officers and detectives around me through it all and I am forever grateful.
Dunn came to visit me at my parent’s house as the trial ended, this I appreciated more than I could ever express to her. She had only words of encouragement and admiration for me. I was still such a complete mess on the inside. Her words did not sink in completely then as they do now. She let me know that I had the ability to help others, if and when I was ever ready. She told me that I could speak at the women’s shelter one day if I so wanted to.
Most of you that have already read my previous posts know that I did everything I could to try and make that part of my life go away. I suppressed it, alienated that part of my life, and just downright fighting that demon every day. Understand that anyone that goes through trauma, deals with it differently, some never, some sooner than later, and some like me that it takes a long time. I found myself searching for Penny Dunn. I saw that she is now the Chief of Police in a town in North Carolina. Penny Dunn is deserving of that role and that town is blessed to have someone like her in their community.
Before any more time passed, I had to get this off my chest and show my gratitude as I look forward to living up to be the woman she saw potential in so many years ago. I will help others and use my voice to support the cause of ending domestic violence and abuse.
From the bottom of my heart, I say thank you for the brave that protected me without hesitation or judgment. I have not forgotten and promise to pay it forward.
